will work for duct tape.

You know how God has a plan for you and he says: “Hey. I have a plan for you. Listen up.”

And you’re like, “hold on – let me do this and then I’ll listen.”

Then a few months go by and God says: “Hey freak, shut up for a second and listen to me: I have a plan for you.” (I firmly believe that God has a sense of humor and would call me names. Why? ‘Cause he made me.)

And you’re like, “hold on – I have to finish this and do this, then I’ll listen.”

A few more months go by and God says, “Good grief, I’ve told you I have a plan for you and you’re not listening!”

You hold your finger to your lips while staring at the shop door watching for just one new customer to wander in and say, “ssshhhh.... I won’t hear the front door bell ring if you're talking to me...”

Then he's like *pffft* and takes the jar of buttons that you’re playing in, shakes it like he’s a big, massive blender on steroids...

Next thing you know you find yourself standing jobless in the T-mobile kiosk, having a nervous breakdown (while sportin’ some BAD hair!) and freaking the cell phone girl out so much she starts crying, comes around the counter and puts her arms around you telling you it’s gonna be okay. Gotta love the T-mobile kiosk girl. When did adding an additional line become such a hard thing to do?! *geesh*

The economy is in a very precarious state – locally and nationally. Businesses, both small and large, are sitting on every penny of profit they bring in, hoping that they are not spending their money frivolously or making bad business choices... no crystal ball telling them what is going to happen tomorrow or the next day or the next.

The advertising business is in an even more precarious state. With the age of free on-line social networking (i.e: twitter, facebook – blogger, etc.) internet ads or email blitzes at a fraction of the cost of print ads or mass mail-outs – the small advertising businesses especially are balancing on their tippy toes in the middle of the ocean on an 1/8” piece of plywood that is getting nipped at by some cool lookin’ sea creature. (I know... I’m so dramatic! Hee-hee)

Due to the economy and businesses holding their breath while waiting for the next customer, sign shops are diversifying; newspapers are folding and/or going on-line. Billboard companies are offering steep discounts and/or going with the large LED boards so that they can have multiple businesses advertising on one board vs. one business – one board. Finances became a lil’ tight in my advertising/sign makin’ world...

Which puts me pounding the pavement and wreaking havoc trying to find a new place to hang my pocketbook. (It’s a gorgeous one – black floral cut velvet with saffron suede fringe that swings like a skirt... when I walk with it I am constantly running my fingers through it.) I’ve also thrown up my duct tape roll and said:

“okay God, I’m sorry, please forgive me for not listening to you. What was your plan for me?”

He hasn’t said yet, but he will as soon as I calm down and listen...

Comin’ to you LIVE from a single-wide where I made a sign that says, “will work for duct tape”... seriously – who would not hire me with that hanging around my neck?! While I'm waiting and listening... I’ve made an ahhhmazing dent in filling my empty shelves. Warrenton, here I come! Funky Finds – here I come! World - Be Warned: You are my oyster... here I come.


p.s. I’d like to go on record as saying (though I’m jobless): without twitter, facebook , blogger etc. I wouldn’t know you – and YOU are really really important to me. The “free advertising” world has brought me friends and loved ones, I’ve had doors and windows opened to me that I could not have imagined in my wildest dreams... and you. I have you in my life. I like that. ;-D

paper bag please.

Notice anything missing?

I have Funky Finds Spring Fling in March... the 10th and 11th.

Warrenton/Zapp Hall Spring show set-up begins... uhmmm... at the end of March - the show runs through Easter week-end.

We will not discuss the orders I have to fill between right now and then.

comin' to you LIVE from a single-wide where someone needs to hand me a paper bag really quick-like 'cause I'm hyperventilating... let me re-phrase that. I'm hyperventilating while duct taped to my sewing machine because that's not very many pocketbooks... wanna come play in my laboratory with me? I promise... I won't work you toooooooooo hard. (my fingers are totally crossed behind my back.) hee-hee

worried about oatmeal.

I'm a worrier. I know - that statement comes from out of nowhere, but it's a fact. However, I'm not your average worrier. You can tell me "the sky is falling! the sky is falling!" and I'll stand there all mouthhangin'open, wearing a silly grin while mumbling, "at least it's fluffy clouds and sparklin' thangs and not cinder blocks or tires!"!

Yes, I am disgustingly - you would want to whack me upside my head - optimistic in my worrying habits.

But... I'm still a silent worrier. And then it eats a hole in my belly. And then I'm havin' to eat oatmeal for a couple of weeks because:

This is a cereal that is considered to be soothing food for the nerves. It is one of the best sources of Inositol, which is important for maintaining blood cholesterol level. Oats are amazingly high in calcium, potassium and magnesium, together with lots of B complex -- all are vital to a healthy nervous system.

And it's easy on the belly that has a hole in it.

'Cept... I DO NOT LIKE oatmeal! Blech!

When I was little "the Mama" used to make us oatmeal for breakfast during the winter months before she would leave for work. So... I would sit at the dining table, legs dangling from my chair looking all angelic and innocent while waiting for my bowl of BLECH to cool off... it was SO amazing how it got JUST cool enough for the dog to eat it as "the Mama's" tail-lights rounded the corner.

I bought the "multi-flavor" box of oatmeal... cinnamon/apple, cinnamon spice and maple/brown sugar... it's still "blech". I did a google search: "How to make oatmeal taste better", and found these suggestions...

Raisins and brown sugar 

Low-fat granola and skim milk 

Currants and golden raisins 

Raspberry nonfat yogurt and dried cranberries 

Apricot fruit spread and sliced almonds 

Sliced strawberries and plain nonfat yogurt sprinkled with cinnamon 

Maple flavored pancake syrup and a sprinkle of sunflower seeds 

Canned crushed pineapple, sliced bananas, and chopped nuts 

Strawberry nonfat yogurt and sliced kiwi 

Sliced bananas and vanilla nonfat yogurt sprinkled with cinnamon 

Reduced fat peanut butter and strawberry fruit spread 

Chopped dates, raisins, and walnuts 

Coarsely chopped canned peaches and ground ginger 

Diced dried apricots and honey 

Apple butter and raisins 

Blueberry fruit spread and vanilla or plain nonfat yogurt 

Orange marmalade and dried cranberries 

Coarsely chopped apple and brown sugar 

Reduced fat caramel topping and a sprinkle of chopped pecans 

Warm apple pie filling and skim milk 

Honey crunch flavor wheat germ and cinnamon 

Canned pear slices and maple flavor pancake syrup 

Skim milk and sliced peaches 

Mixed dried fruit 

Cherry preserves and wheat germ 

Diced cranberries and maple flavored pancake syrup 

Chunky natural applesauce 

Sliced bananas and mini-semisweet chocolate morsels 

Blueberries and sliced strawberries sprinkled with cinnamon-sugar 

Canned pumpkin and pumpkin pie spice

Somewhere along the search I read, "soy sauce and sesame seeds"... who knew? How do you eat your oatmeal? Or... does your dog eat it? Mine might get a taste of it tonight...

comin' to you LIVE from a single-wide where it's raining today and yesterday and tomorrow (YAY!!!) but my pretty roof that is supposed to be invincible is leaking in my laundry room. (worry) At least it's not leaking through-out the whole house... but if it WAS leaking through-out the whole house, does the clean-up count as "mopping the floor?" (disgusting optimism.) hee-hee

I have a crush.

It's a BIG crush. One of those *tee-hee-hee* giggly,

gettin' all tongue-tied,

I would blush (aka: turn bright red) and proll'y quit breathing if he ever looked at me,

*swoon*-like crushes.

I have a crush on Jonathan Adler...

I go bananas for anything Jonathan Adler.

I keep thinking I'm going to outgrow it... but... no. Year after year I'm still crushin'.

I see his fun stuff and awesomeness and consider being his stalker...

starting with being all secret/sly/stalkerish and spending a few weeks days hours in one of his stores. Have you ever been to one of his stores?


comin' to you LIVE from a single-wide where some day the ohsotalented Mr. Adler is going to decide he needs a single-wide in his "I've created this masterpiece" portfolio... hee-hee


all of the photos are from when I went on a wild pinning spree this morning (here)... I've lost my MAKE SOMETHING FANTASTIC NOW mojo and my crush might have it. (Do you think that reason would hold up in court when I'm asked why I'm stalking Jonathan Adler? "But Judge, sir... he has my mojo.")

it's been established...

that i'm just not right, right?
i mean, you know this about me already, right?

well. last night i'm in my new "photo lab" (aka: storage room that had 3 extra square feet of prime real-estate) taking photos of my new clutch design/pattern: "aud.rey".

i decide i need a hand as a prop.

do you remember how i murdered the "very tall woman"?

exhibit A: here.
exhibit B: here.

uhmmm... i grab her arm with her hand miraculously still attached from under my bed and i think:

self: "this works"

other self: "this does work, but she has some serious road rash"

self: "that's okay 'cause I'm a red.neck and stuff happens"

other self: "it doesn't look healthy... her hand does not look healthy"

self (starts laughing and then cry-laughing then has to sit down from the cry-laughing that is happening)

self:

"i could call it the DEATH CLUTCH"

comin' to you LIVE from a single-wide where yes indeedy i'm watching for the white suit coat company to come take my measurements. do you think if I list "aud.rey" in my Etsy store as the "death clutch" she will sell?

disclaimer: i'm not normally this morbid, so don't be skeert. i DO have mannequin parts under my bed. again, don't be skeert...

prime real-estate.

Real-estate is a hot commodity in the single-wide.

And... since I'm embracing the fact that I'm a stacker/piler/layerer (thank you Janet!)...

I'm ALSO embracing the fact that only a small portion of my dining table gets used. Chili dogs only take up so much room.



Since the back 40 was just piled layered with whoknowswhat I'm putting it to work.

While I was cleaning the storage room I found my laptop buried under piles of... well... stacks LAYERS and thought, "oh - HEY! I've been needing that!"

I stack, I pile, I layer... I use my lap top and not all of my dining real-estate. I've got my laptop - a gooseneck lamp (the older I get the more light I seem to require!) and a big comfortable, cushy chair. It all makes perfect sense now... 'cept maybe my apparent fascination with tea cups.




comin' to you LIVE from a single-wide where I'm trying to find the perfect piece of "interesting" for that corner. I had "eat" up there in giant channel letters but they have since moved on... hmmm.....


P.S. A couple of fun facts: The tray in the middle is a birch tray that the red.neck Step-Daddy made for each family for Christmas and the wire rimmed glasses are some that Jill - the CEO and mastercreativemind of Jill Ruth & Co. made and sent to me!