Tuesday, July 27

gardening 101

I don't know if you know this about me, but I'm a gardening fool.


Yep - I can grow rocks with the best of 'em!!

But when I was younger I gave gardening everything I had:

One evening "the Mama" came home with a new car.  I remember standing with her and the red.neck brothers in the doorway looking at it... our heads tilted to the left - then the right... back to the left... I'm not sure which of the four of us named it - but named it we did:


Uhmmm... yep.  It stuck. Like peanut butter.
Now - I think "the Mama" was tapping in to her secret "I wanna be a race car DIVA" side 'cause that car could get up and GO!  How do I know this?  Well... this is where my gardening journey begins...


"the Mama" quickly realized that the trip from Crawford to Waco involved owning stock in the local fill-'er-up station, so the Pregnant Peanut was goin' on the market. Maybe the Farmer's Market? *snicker* She made a "For Sale" sign, put it on the car - she might have listed it in the paper, I'm not sure - and parked the car in our front driveway. It sat there for a week or so...


School had been out for a few weeks.  The older red.neck brother was working at the grocery store a few blocks away and I was in charge of the younger red.neck brother.  We rode our bikes past the Pregnant Peanut - we walked around the Pregnant Peanut... we loitered on the hood of the Pregnant Peanut.  The time had come.  The Pregnant Peanut had met her match...

The two of us were the King and Queen of McGyver re-runs - we could do it all.  We were fully prepared - 1 flat head screwdriver with an insulated handle (check), 1 drill and a small drill bit (check).
We had bricks to mark where each tire needed to go upon return.  We had a tube to hook up to the lawnmower gas can so that we could siphon the gas we burned - ready to mark the gas gauge so we couldn't mess up the refueling situation.

Turned out we just needed some tape to mark the spot where the keys were hanging inside the back door - kinda took the wind out of our hot-wirin' sails.
McGyver who?  A-Team who?  Nightrider - WHO?!


And - off we go...  of Course the youngest red.neck hoodlum brother was in the passenger seat (I was in charge of him after all...) - I was NOT going down alone!!! The first trip was around Crawford...

up and down various roads - some alleys - more roads.  One intersection had the coolest amount of gravel build-up and you KNOW that required some extra speed and brake-testin'... so that resulted in some donuts and flyin' gravel - HUGE laughs, grins and giggles - THIS WAS SO MUCH FUN!!!
Who knew!
Oh... the kid that lived in front of the donut makin' spot knew EXACTLY where to find the oldest red.neck brother (and did - I didn't know he could get home so fast - or that his eyes could be that BIG! "you are in SOOOO much trouble!!!")...oops. No worries - we'll just go OUT of town (after big red.neck brother went back to work) - surely we can't get busted OUT of town, can we?  No.


up a hill - around a bend - down a hill - "faster!  go faster!!!" - the feel of the summer wind whipping through the Pregnant Peanut - the pure joy and exhilaration of sitting on the edge of that seat in order to reach the gas pedal - music blasting (I'm sure it was Freebird or something...) - trying to reach the brake peddle -
"find the brake peddle 'cause there's some more gravel up on that turn... pick up some more speed - FASTER - STEP ON IT!!!" Donuts were made - the MOST AMAZING spray of gravel - MILES of it flying up in the air - up, up, up and over a drainage ditch - plowing the garden for those nice country folk...


Dontcha' know - that's how rednecks make salads?  We were pulling tomatoes and onions and I THINK some lettuce out of that front bumper... for a while...
hearts thumping - little hands shaking - trying SO hard not to giggle and high-five each other - c'mon - who else can say they've had a Pregnant Peanut AIR BORN - AND come out alive... salad in hand!!!

I think the car sold a few days after that.  Wanna know the funny part of this story?  "the Mama" didn't know about all of this until about 4-5 years ago... I drove for the first time WAY before I got my license... the same year I started gardening.  I'm still waiting for my Master Gardener certificate.

Comin' to you LIVE from a single-wide (where I'm pulling my hair. The resident teen turns 16 in September - think I should get him some gardening gloves?)...hee-hee
;-D  robelyn
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